Voice Mail!

[not_every_mage]

-- aste's corset, how do you know when this contraption is working?

Er, hello. This is Anders. Do ... whatever you do when you're talking to one of these things, and I'll respond when I can.

---

[OOC: This journal is for RP purposes only. I do not own Anders, Dragon Age, or Toby Regbo.]

Comments

[spin_kick_snap]

"We had two good months," Kathy said and then stopped.

Two months. They'd only had two months together and barely that. A little bit of Kathy wondered if it wouldn't just be better to let it go. She was just so tired of fighting and hoping and it still not being enough. Two months of a high school romance--most people would say it wouldn't have lasted anyway. Maybe she should leave that behind in LA, along with Banzai and her family.

"I hate to admit how much of that is my own idiocy."

But the way this conversation was lacerating her heart was nothing compared to how she felt when she thought of saying anything like that out loud.

She'd fight. For Anders.

[not_every_mage]

"Some of it was me, too," Anders said, since it seemed like a better idea than telling Kathy she'd been an idiot again. "I knew how much I liked you, but I was so worried about hurting anyone I didn't admit things weren't right with Nathan until he was ready to go. And then ... then we had two months."

And to be fair, they really had been incredible months. There just weren't enough of them.

[spin_kick_snap]

By god, they had been. And Kathy had been so busy looking forward to what was next, she didn't think she'd properly appreciated what she'd had. Because those had been the two best months of her life, hands down.

"You made me so happy," she said softly. "No matter what happens next, I just want you to know that I had never been happier than during those two months."

[not_every_mage]

Anders smiled slightly into the phone, a melancholy twist in his stomach. He thought Kathy was being a little dramatic, but it wasn't as if she didn't have a good reason.

"Me either," he said. "Only time in my life I felt completely safe. We should've known it wouldn't last."

[spin_kick_snap]

"Maybe," Kathy said. "I don't know. I mean, it couldn't last the way it was. Even if there weren't exes in Los Angeles, our situation would have at least changed. But I don't think it necessarily had to end the way it did."

[not_every_mage]

"I think I can safely say it's not why people normally stop seeing each other," Anders said, voice laced with dark humor. "Oh, but I don't know what would have happened either. I just tend to be a pessimist about things like that. Always seems to me like everybody leaves eventually."

[spin_kick_snap]

"But hey," Kathy said with deliberate lightness. "At least one of us came back."

So maybe things were changing for him?

[not_every_mage]

"Maybe my luck's changing," Anders suggested, matching the deliberate lightness. "That'd be nice, at least."

[spin_kick_snap]

"I hope so," Kathy said, realizing anew what Dante being a Nephilim could mean, what Vergil could mean. He had people who understood Limbo and demons with him. He had someone with a plan to stop the demons.

He no longer had an expiration date, not quite the same way.

"I really hope so."

[not_every_mage]

Anders let out a soft, pleased huff.

Then -- feeling like the conversation might have done as much as it could -- he spoke in a slightly apologetic tone.

"I should get back to vacationing," he said. "I have a busy evening lying on the beach ahead of me. But call if you need to talk about all the stuff in your head, all right?"

[spin_kick_snap]

"I'll try," Kathy said. "It's still hard to, sometimes."

Talking meant she had to face it. Meant dumping it on someone else. Meant she had to keep hoping everyone stays patient while she ranted and rambled on about the same things.

"But I'll try. If you promise you don't mind. And we'll talk when you get back. Until then?"

[not_every_mage]

"Until then," Anders agreed. "Bye, Kathy."

There was a melancholy clench in his stomach as he hung up. Things with Kathy were improving, but the ease and happiness they'd known a year ago was still missing. He didn't know if it was even fair to want them to come back.